Recorded 10/16/20 at 12:18 a.m.
Danielle reading the episode recap after we lost Episode 44: The Letter, The Lover and the Tortle That Cared Too Much
Please edit out the back half of this recording, HE got into the booth and I do not want to hear his voice right now.

AI: Episode 43 – Glovey Boots 2: Booty Gloves

Ever had one of those vacations where it was such an unmitigated disaster that the journey home feels like it takes a million years, and you’d sacrifice every one of your friends’ souls to an unholy demigod just to sleep in your own bed again? Yeah, its about time we head back to Fireshear…

Join us this week on a brand new episode of Adventurific as the intrepid Company hauls anchor and leaves that ramshackle death box known as Shark…Darkrim… is it Carpkin Scoop? Whatever, we pack up and leave that shit hole in the dust.

Not to worry, dear listener. There’s plenty waiting for us back in Fireshear, such as a bar that needs checking in on, Quint and Trundle need to do some shopping slash arguing with an old man, and Skip’s got a package waiting for him! Don’t worry, Tally also has stuff going on, like maybe a little bit of backstory…perhaps? How’s that for a hook?

So grab your Booty and find its matching Glove, because on this week’s Adventurific, you’re going to learn some real mind blowing stuff about trees and if you’ve ever peed on one, you’re not going to like it!

AI: Episode 42 – Quint Measuring Contest

Alright, I was instructed by Legal that I need to apologize for my comments in last week description.

Giraffes are not “God’s Mistakes” or “poorly constructed horses”; they are quality animals.

Not like Beavers, those over achieving water squirrels. Get a dental plan, you flat tailed chainsaws!

What was I talking about?

Oh, yeah, this week’s episode of Adventurific.

This week, the Company makes tracks to the local watering hole to see a man about a tattoo, Quint gets into it with a rival captain (for obvious reasons), and when the security of the ship is compromised Skip gets all “Maximum Effort” for whatever reason!

I have no idea why, but does anyone here really understand why Skip does anything he does?

I didn’t think so.

So belly up to the bar and remember not to wake the tortle because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, it would be REALLY helpful if you stopped stabbing the Changling!

AI: Episode 41 – Put the Rest on a Gift Card

I’ve got to ask, does anyone actually read these things? Like, could I type anything here and no one would ever notice?

Let’s find out…

Welcome to Adventurific!

On this week’s episode, The Company has a nice little chat about our newly acquired level ups, have a nice little shopping spree over at The Bone Collector and Skip has a nice little lesson about how to talk to people of otherworldly authority!

All in all, it’s a nice little episode!

I’ve never trusted giraffes.

I feel like they are just poorly constructed horses and no one has the guts to admit God made a mistake.

So remember to budget accordingly and speak loudly, yet clearly into the stone because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, if I buy more than 3 skeletons, can I get a discount?

AI: Episode 40 – Anyway, We Delivered the Bomb

Holy Biscuits!

Can you actually BELIEVE that this ramshackle crew of ding dongs actually MANAGED to escape the likes of an adult kraken AND on top of that, fly their ship all the way to safety while it was LITERALLY falling apart around them?

I can’t and I was there!

Well, hold on to those socks because the list of things we are capable of will only get longer on this week’s Adventurific as the Company sets foot into the pirate sanctuary of Sharkskin cove!

That’s right! An entire town for pirates! Who would have guessed that was even possible?!

It’s now up to Quint to pull up all his old Seaman™ trainin and not only keep us out of trouble, but also get on the good graces of the Pirate Queen herself!

Tough act for some, but there’s no one slicker than Quint Strideshaw.

So pack your “Orc to Common” translation guide, and remember who you’re talking to, because on this week’s Adventurific, DO NOT get that stuff on your skin, it will burn STRAIGHT through to the bone!

AI: Episode 39 – Man’s Dilemma

Okay, let’s be serious for a second.

There’s been a little tension with a few members of the Company lately. It’s nothing serious, no one got hurt, but there needs to be a dialog before this goes too far…

Yeah you got it; someone’s getting yelled at this week…

Tune in to this much needed episode of Adventurific as the only one who knows how to run a boat correctly takes issue with the only one who knows how to reset his own thumb after he dislocates it messing around. Also, because that wasn’t exciting enough, all of us learn the limits of the Soggy Clam and you can bet your ass we’re going to push this baby as far as she can go!

Yeah, no, it’s nothing but positive vibes over here.

So, remember who got you what you have and don’t look at that shape following us, because on this week’s Adventurific, I don’t care what happens, no one is allowed to do a Scotty from “Star Trek”” impression! I mean it.

AI: Episode 38 – Here’s to Swimming With Bear Legged Women

Holy biscuits!

I bet you, the listener, weren’t expecting that!

Of all things to happen on a boat, I’m certain NONE of you were ready for the blatant abuse of captain authority, let alone the mistreatment of an innocent changeling!

Yeah, we here at Adventurific like to keep things spicy, so good luck keeping up with all our twists and turns!

Also, see Kraken

Tune in this week as the Company grapples with the monstrous sea beast that seems to have a decent hold on our ship, Tally learns the powers hidden within the frigid ursidae, and Quint struggles with the moral responsibility of keeping the boat from sinking! That and drowning, nobody likes to drown. So, pray that the polar ice caps don’t melt and remember to wear eye protection because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, there’s always a bigger fish…

AI: Episode 37 – Little Shakin’, Little Tenderizin

We’ve all had job’s we’ve hated, mostly because they involve taking orders from people who think they are bigger than they really are. They’ll push you around, they’ll try to belittle you, and they will most certainly always blame you when something goes wrong, but no matter how frustrating that can be, just remember one thing. There’s always a bigger threat waiting to swallow you whole, and it’s probably closer than you think.

Dial back the ominous foreshadowing because it’s time for a brand new Adventurific! Come along this week as the Company investigates a mysterious smoke plume on the horizon, Skip gets a little too excited and prematurely pops off, and Tally flies higher than she’s ever flown before!

Boy howdy, I wish I could adequately tease what happens on today’s episode but there’s just no way I could properly capture the intensity! So put on your swimsuit and remember to wear a cup because on this week’s Adventurific, something lurks beneath the safety of the Soggy Clam and it has no time for insubordination!

AI: Episode 36 – Like the Hindenburg, but With More Wet

So you’ve chosen to flee. You decided that’s what’s best for your well being and the betterment of those around you, is that you are simply not around.

Make a break for it, so to speak. Sure you can run, but there’s only so far you can get. Trouble may just be able to find you anywhere.

Anchors up and all aboard on this week’s Adventurific as the Company wraps up their business in Waterdeep and set sail back into that deep blue sea! Tune in as Quint attempts to herd cats, Tally tries to keep us on course, Skip does his best, and they all discover what mysteries lies beneath the waves in a tale abroad no one could ever see coming!

Well, maybe you could, if you were, like, a mind wizard or whatever…

So batten down the hatches and remember to keep a firm grip on your valuables in the chop because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, we go up! NOW!

AI: Episode 35 – Mom and Pop, Stop

There’s a certain kind of look that only parents seem to have. The one that says “I’ll always love you more than the stars in the sky”, but at the same time screams, “Holy hell, my biggest regret is that I taught you to swim because I would have tossed you in the river YEARS ago”.

Skip has seen that look A LOT.

And now, thanks to this week’s Adventurific, you get hear this kind of family interactions LIVE (i.e. pre-recorded).

Join us as the Company has to sit through one of THOSE dinners, Jayla and Skip switch dynamics for a hot minute, we dig further into the mystery of Kai Goowin, and Quint rounds out the rest of his crew with someone he should have hired back in Fireshire! Who knew you needed so many people to run a flying warship? So take a pull of the Goowin brew, and be careful on your way out of the window, because on this week’s Adventurific, regret is a strong word, but I should have asked your Dad to wear a condom after number 3!

AI: Episode 34 – Mom and Pop Stop

They say “home is where the heart is”, but what that means in the grand scheme of things is a mystery to most. It could mean that you are never free of where you grew up, and no matter how hard you try, it’ll always be calling you back. Maybe it means that all of the most important decisions usually tend to lay close to home. Or maybe, it’s just some bullshit that losers say when you leave them in the dust…

Whatever it means, you better be ready for a brand new Adventurific! This week, The Company makes it to the wondrous port town of Waterdeep, and they’ve already been called into a meeting with the big dogs over at AI and there’s more at stake than just their livelihoods! Let’s hope it goes well, Skip would hate to move back home…FORESHADOWING! So, put on your good tie and don’t talk with your mouth full because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, it’s all hardcore negotiations and down home comfort!

AI: Episode 33 – The Maidan Voyage of the Soggy Clam

The fresh salt air melts your cheeks. The roaring waves send your stomach into a tailspin. All of the hell you go through for a hot meal and a place to rest your head, was it worth it? Probably not, considering that a bunch of assholes were just GIVEN a flying warship and are in no position to keep it afloat. Pull up the anchor because it’s time for a new episode of Adventurific! We had the choice to stay on land, but thanks to our thirst for adventure, we are now stuck on this GODFORSAKEN boat with a Captain who has yet to even learn how to fly the boat, a hapless crew of scabs, and a Changling who has cut his arms to ribbons on the harpoons. We are NOT going to survive the trip to Waterdeep. So, hoist the sails and hide the biscuits from that ball-busting Captain because its high seas adventure on this week’s Adventurific and we’re going to need all hands on deck!

AI: Episode 32 – Sorrrrrrbin

Ever feel like getting away? Like far away from all the nonsense that surrounds you, the stresses the cloud your every thought, and potential lawsuits that are just plain frivolous and unnecessary? Yeah, it’s time for a vacation.

Join us this week on Adventurific as the Company prepares for their WELL DESERVED R&R by taking care of some business like hiring some fresh blood to pick up the slack, grabbing some much needed supplies at Pimm’s, and most importantly, throwing down at the Coal Chute’s world famous Fight Night! Yeah, its one of those episodes…

So, grab your teeth from the bucket, and remember to haggle, because on this weeks episode Adventurific, the man, the myth, the legend RETURNS…

AI: Episode 31 – Put on Your Boss Pants

Every once in a while, you might be required to put in more effort than you feel is required. I know that sounds insane, but you may be asked to step up, make the big choices, and act like the big person you should be by now in your life.

Welcome to this week’s Adventurific, where responsibility, critical thinking, and tough choices coalesce into a fine paste that I only ask you take ONE bite of. On today’s show, Skip must put on his manager face and hire some new blood at the Chute, Tally has her hands full with a ding dong who can’t take a hint, and Quint does merciless things to our new flying ship. We will probably have to burn it later just to get the stains out…

So shine your shoes and remember to act like you want to be there, because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, why don’t you give me three of your weaknesses and one better not be “I care TOO much”!

TFTL: Episode 19 – Summer Camp Part II: What Lies Beneath the Lake

Camp can be a tough thing for a child to deal with. It’s a new place, with unfamiliar faces who boss around, making them do nonsense activities all for the amusements of lazy counselors who would MUCH rather be smoking dope and literally doing anything else. Now take that and pile on a mysterious shape at the bottom of the lake, multiplied by the fact it’s in Moody River. Things are about to get REALLY strange on this week’s Adventurific as the Gang from Moody River continues enjoying their summer vacation at Camp WannaMcGuffin, all while attempting to discover whatever secrets the lake holds. However, there’s always more hidden in the shadows and things are about to get truly, truly outrageous for the Gang, let’s just hope they can handle it! So grab your bow and make sure not to play with fire because on this week’s Tales from the Loop finale, you never know what’s out there in the darkness until it gets you first!

TFTL: Episode 18 – Summer Camp

Thank the stars school is FINALLY over and lucky for you, your grades weren’t that bad, so what better reward for your hard work than a trip to the bug infested, ungodly hot and all around uncomfortable great woods of Moody River, Minnesota!

That’s right! We’re diving back into Tales from the Loop! Join us as Teddy and Chester begin their summer vacation at Camp Wannamaguffin, with Kitty and Dwight keeping a close eye on them as official Camp Counselors! However, just like most camps in the 80’s, not everything is as peaceful as it seems and a sinister secret haunts these woods, and there are more things to worry about than just Teddy with a bow and arrow!

So, pack your bag and don’t forget the bug spray because on this week on Adventurific, you’re heading to Summer Camp!

AI: Episode 30 – Beef Oven

In the vast sea of history, there can be a lot of variables to contend with. A strong push or pull in a direction you might not agree with but are forced to follow. You are merely a passenger on a ship being dragged out further than you ever wished to journey.

You are stuck.

However, sometimes, if you choose, you can be in control. Sometimes, you can be the captain… If you are willing to take the keys…

Join us this week on a brand new Adventurific as Quint grapples with his duties for destiny, we welcome a new member into the Coal Chute family, and Tally struggles with the responsibility of upper management especially when the employee couldn’t find the sun with a map.

It’s going to be a long shift at the Chute tonight. So, grab the most authoritarian looking hat, and make sure to feed and walk your new friend, because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, if he piddles on the floor, you’ll be the one to clean it up!

AI: Episode 29 – Is This What Success Looks Like?

You’re in a tight spot. You’ve spent so much time and effort getting to your peak that you have no time life to think of an exit strategy if it all goes to hell. It’ll all crumble around you and you’ll just be standing there holding the shattered pieces of your dreams thinking “how could I have stopped this?”. Here’s the thing; you couldn’t…see where I’m going with this? Join us this week on Adventurific as Skip’s choices finally come home to roost, Quint feels harder than he’s ever felt before, and Tally makes a positive D.I.Y. choice while her friends suffer. What else is new? So bite the leather and don’t let them get to you, because on this week’s brand new episode of Adventurific, you know the old saying; “What goes up…” yadda yadda, everything works out or something like that…

AI: Episode 28 – That Kind of Breakup

Man, its been a spell, hasn’t it? Get it? “Spell”, like one a wizard would do?

Yeah, Adventurific is back.

Join us this week on as the Company rebounds from their day in court, figures out what the future holds for a newly acquitted group of ne’er-do-wells, and Skip has to make the difficult decision on whether or not to burn a bridge to save his own skin! I’m sure he’ll make the right call, especially because he has a perfect track record when it comes to these sort of things. So dust off your earbuds and prepare for the worst, because on this glorious return for Adventurific, there’s train wrecks, and then there’s Skip Goowin!

AI: Episode 27 – Your Day in Court

Only once in a great while does a simple disagreement between parties stir up such a fervor in a quaint snow covered town that all life as we know it comes to a standstill to await the outcome. This is definitely not that sort of trial. However, on this week’s episode of Adventurific, the future of our rambunctious entrepreneurs hangs in the balance as the trial of Deewee vs. Acquisitions Incorporated finally begins! Can the company successfully bob and weave between the misguided accusations of the angry prosecution, or will all their past indiscretions finally catch up with them and bring an end to all they’ve built? It’s probably the most intense small claims suit you’ve ever heard! So speak clearly into the mic and answer to the best of your knowledge because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, you’re innocent until the DM decides otherwise!

AI: Episode 26 – My Cousin Quinty

Listen, DOOM Eternal just came out and I feel like we shouldn’t be away from each other, so I’m going to make this quick…

Welcome to this week’s Adventurific! On today’s episode, Quint and Marco make a quick pit stop to the Deewee residence, some of us get a little too turned up the night before, and we get prepped for what shall now be known as “The Trial of This Particular Morning” Everybody laughed…

So hitch up your lawyering pants and DOOM Eternal because on this week’s Adventurific, I’m going to go play DOOM Eternal. Enjoy!

AI: Episode 25 – Lawyer? I Hardly Know Her!

What’s that stupid saying only nerds tell you because they’re weak? “Honesty is the best policy”? No, no, my strange naive friend. Honest is only best when you can’t get the best lawyers corporate money can buy. Isn’t the judicial system fantastic? Join us this week on a brand new episode of Adventurific as a godsend with a briefcase arrives at the bar, and the Company begins building a flawless strategy against the looming case against the Deewee’s, Skip decides to dig himself a little deeper by taking a meeting with the LAST PERSON he should be messing with, and follows that with pulling the rug out from under that only people that can keep him alive! Yeah, he’s not really good at this critical thinking thing… So, have you or someone you know been diagnosed with mesothelioma after listening OTHER D&D podcasts; please call now because you might be entitled to this week’s episode of Advenurific!

AI: Episode 24 – Take a Look, Quint’s in a Book…

So…you’ve made a deal with a demon. It’s a pretty simple transaction, they give you whatever your heart desires, and in return, you unwittingly give up an essential part of yourself and, more than likely, unknowingly agree to be a part of whatever unholy pact that demon demands. See? Simple. Join us this week on a brand new episode of Adventurific as Skip gets EXACTLY what he was looking for, but maybe not in the condition he expected, Quint does what he does best and reaches out to the AI legal department, and later joins Tally on a very fulfilling and worthwhile trip to the local library! Remember kids, reading a book is the BEST way to get the knowledge needed to discover new lands AND drain all the blood from your enemies! So grab the name tags and remember that Skip is technically a few centimeters taller because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, security guards are not technically cops and you don’t have to listen to them!

AI: Episode 23 – Pazuzu? Pazuzu. Pazuzu!

While you are sitting on a plane heading to Chicago, there’s some time to think about stuff. Not a lot of time, but just enough. Like, when our eclectic bunch of entrepreneurs first got together, there were simple plans of owning a bar, perhaps some petty crime, maybe even a few light scrap ups with some rabblerousers. Nothing too complicated. However, with this brand new episode of Adventurific, things start taking a wild turn for the weird. Join us this week as we attempt to keep Bob out of harms way, learn a new word that carries more weight then any of us have the strength to endure, and Skip puts another coin in the “Stupid Decision” jar that seems to be overflowing as it is! Trust me, this one will TOTALLY work out, though… So, lower that knife and say that name three times because this week, it’s SHOWTIME!

AI: Episode 22 – What We Stab in the Shadows

Sometimes in life you need to make a call on whether or not a grudge is worth keeping, or if you are better off setting your differences aside for the greater good. It’s a tough call, sure, but if you let that hate build up, the resulting release may spell more trouble than it’s worth! You hear that, Nick? You are beneath me. Join us this week on Adventurific as the search for Jayla continues! However, as simple as i was figuring out WHERE she was being held, getting her out in one piece may be a bigger challenge than once thought. Don’t worry, Skip is fully torqued, Tally is as bright as ever, and Quint knows how to get around unnoticed, but this time, he may not be alone in those shadows… So wire up those jaws and start blending your meals because on this week’s HELL-RAISING episode of Adventurific, we are going for that sweet first round TKO!

AI: Episode 21 – IT’S DO-NUT TIME!

So look who came crawling back. It’s not like us to hold a grudge or anything, but we would like to bask in this moral superiority for a bit longer. …

Okay, that’s enough.

Welcome to this week’s episode of Adventurific! After last week’s EXPLOSIVE and SURPRISING revelation from the once thought best friend group of local authorities, it appears that those dang old double-crossers now need the detective skills of our intrepid heroes to track down Jayla after she mysteriously disappeared while on a quest to track down a Dark Wizard with a heart of gold for us. Why do we need one of those? Not important, move on. Can our Company of super sleuths uncover what happened to everyone’s favorite hardass? They might but it’ll take a brief trip to a mystical part of the city few dare to enter, and even less come back from alive! So grab yourself a freshly baked breakfast pastry, and whisper your deepest, darkest secret into your left palm because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, some of us may be willing to pay out the nose to avoid getting our hands dirty!

AI: Episode 20 – Haricots Renversés

Being honest with your friends is important. It’s the foundation to earning trust, building better relationships, and creating an environments for positive growth and enrichment. Plus, liars are real pieces of dragon dung who can rot in the deepest pits of the Under Dark for all I care. When this BRAND NEW episode of Adventurific comes out, you’ll see what I mean. Especially when Skip, Quint and Tally finally come clean with Brightness about what’s been going on in her city, have a heart to heart with Jayla, Bob, and Prometheus, and get a startling piece of news that will change EVERYTHING we’ve come to expect with how this city is ran! And, don’t give me any of that crap about how the rest of us haven’t STOPPED lying in 146 episodes, because that is all nonsense and I will deny it up and down! So it’s time to come clean and start being honest because in this episode of Adventurific, we are DONE being played like a bunch of out of town yokels!

AI: Episode 19 – Quint Pro Quo

Ever been stuck in a situation, that no matter how hard you try you can’t seem to get through it? Like, no matter how much effort you put into it, it’s like spinning your wheels in the wet Minnesotan snow, with no headway getting made. Ever. This is what today’s episode of Adventurific is all about. Join us this week as Tally attempts to put makeup on a pig, Skip and Quint try to make peace with someone who is WAY out of their league, and they come up with a plan so insane that it actually careens back into the realm of logical! It’s actually so awesome that I consider it one of our personal best…and that ain’t saying much! So grab your finest hard hat and find your favorite brick wall, because on this episode of Adventurific, you just can’t get blood from a stone!

AI: Episode 18 – Sneaky, Sneaky, Those Stairs Are Creaky

Safety is probably the MOST important thing we try to teach here at Adventurific. I’m not kidding! We honestly try our best every week to show you what happens when caution is thrown to the wind and all hell has sufficiently broken loose. We do that because we care. On this week’s skull smashing new episode of Adventurific, follow along as the Company wastes too much time being something they are not, Skip tries WAY TOO hard at something he is no good at, and we all learn a valuable lesson that we will probably forget just as soon as the episode ends… sorry Nick. So grab your helmet and don’t forget to wax the stairs because when this week’s brand new episode of Adventurific is over, it’ll be really important you don’t fall asleep!

AI: Episode 17 – Mine Over Matter

Deep within the bowels of the Earth there are miles and miles of untapped resources just waiting for a team of hard working citizens to salvage from the depths and supply the rest of us with wealth and valuables beyond our wildest dreams. However, if those hard working citizens start mysteriously disappearing, it starts affecting the bottom line, and in a world of profit and numbers, that ain’t good. So you call in the best team you can find, and…you can probably see where I am going with all this… Join us this week on Adventurific as we trudge our asses all the way up into the hills to figure out why a bunch of 9-to-5ers have decided to go against company policy and end up missing. Knowing our luck, it’ll probably be because some spooky ass curse or some conspiracy. Either way, we will definitely be in way over our heads. So grab your hardhat and don’t let OSHA know we aren’t fully licensed, because this week on Adventurific, you either run or watch your ass get run over.

AI: Episode 16 – A Walk in the Park

Sorry, I don’t really have much of a joke intro here, but I’m under the clock… hey that’ll do! Join us this week on Adventurific as the gang hits the town to get another quest, Skip attends a VERY IMPORTANT meeting, and the Company has a brief discussion on the upcoming litigation their unnecessary shenanigans have brought upon them. There’s an old saying about reaping what you sow, but it was probably said by some asshole who DIDN’T nearly have his soul sucked out of eye sockets. So take a knee, grab some nuts, and run out the clock, because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, we have no plans on backing down, especially when we are obviously wrong!

AI: Episode 15 – Bar Rescued

There’s a buzz in the air. Can you feel it? It’s electricity that one cannot properly describe, but it comes from that excitement of new beginnings and hard work finally paying off. It’s the result of all the blood, sweat, and tears shed over the realization of one singular dream… The Coal Chute is open for business! Yes, that’s right! On this week’s episode of Adventurific, the Company buckles down, cleans up, and finally opens the doors of Fireshear’s hottest new bar! There’s so much at stake! You just know that everyone is going to be at their best if we are going to make this opening night a success, but of course, it wouldn’t be us if there wasn’t a little nudity, a mild amount of drug dealing, and a whole heck of a lot of blood spilled. Hell, if we pull this off, we might finally rise up the social ranks a littl, instead of just being those losers at the edge of town who own that place where all those people died. So loosen up those wallets and remember to double check your wardrobe because on this episode of Adventurific, we are FINALLY open for business!

AI: Episode 14 – Let’s Hang a Chandelier

Listen, we all make mistakes, it’s part of being human. Sometimes it’s as simple as forgetting to do something that you were asked to do. Other times, you make a mistake so serious that it requires a jar that you have to put money in if you accidentally mention it. On this week’s episode of Adventurific, one of our intrepid heroes makes one of those serious mistakes and it sets us all down a course that no matter how much we lie or try to ignore, there is no turning back. Try to play at home to guess who REALLY shits the bed, I bet you won’t be able to figure it out! So grab from the bottom and lift with your legs, on this week’s episode of Adventurific, it’s time to start living with that plausible deniability!

AI: Episode 13 – Italian Yum Yum Disk, THROW!

I want to be PERFECTLY clear about something: We here at Adventurific DO NOT condone the use of drugs or drug-like substances and if you know of people who do, you should report them immediately….

Are the cops gone? Good.

On this week’s intoxicating episode of Adventurific, the Company looks a little deeper into the ill-gotten gains of last week’s pseudo heist, become a little bit stronger using the power of commerce, and once they reach the next level of critical thinking; they are able to bring one of the greatest inventions ever known to man into the fantasy realm of D&D. Will it make sense canonically? Probably not, but that has never stopped us before. So grab that weird looking vase, and only take half of it at first because on this week’s Adventurific, it’s probably best to do that outside. I don’t want that smell in the house.

AI: Episode 12 – Right in the Ol’ Coal Chute

What would you do if, after discovering a citywide conspiracy, you saw a dead man stapled to a sign…and a Halfling’s dick for the first time? Would that be, like, MIND SHATTERINGLY weird? Great, because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, the Company pulls back from the abyss for a brief second to plot out the proper course of action after last week’s surprises! I’m sure with a concussed Changling, a grumpy old sea captain, a slightly naïve farm girl and a not-drunk-buzzed Dragonborn, we will totally figure all this nonsense out. So grab your TI-83 and put on a pot of Goodberry Tea, because on this episode of Adventurific, we are diving into the books and putting a value on all our assets! It’s shockingly low!

AI: Episode 11 – Big Oof

Josh is still in a tryptophan coma, so that means the description is up to me! This week’s episode is a slow, boring affair where absolutely nothing from the previous day comes back to bite our crew in the ass. Nothing. So wipe the gravy off your face, unbutton your pants, and kick back in the recliner because this week, Adventurific takes it easy.

AI: Episode 10 – Disguise and Conquer

Okay, we NOW know that we can run a successful bar without too much trouble and only one of us ended up with a concussion! That’s good to know! However, on this week’s episode of Adventurific, we move past the bottle episodes of previous, get the low down on some questing that needs doing, and go deep undercover to get that sweet corporate dirt! Don’t worry, I’m sure that NOTHING we do while in disguise will EVER effect us or anyone EVER AGAIN, so we are free to do whatever it takes to get the information we need! I promise. Now grab that broom and start sweeping because on this week’s Adventurific, we’re from the North and I’ve got some boys that need the work!

AI: Episode 9 – I Am Jack’s Glass Jaw

Now, I know what you are thinking. “This season doesn’t really have the action and violence of past Adventurific adventures!” Well, dear listener, may I present you with this week’s episode of Adventurific! One so violent, so extreme, and so disgusting bloody that Nick has spent weeks in the editing bay trying to transform this “Adults Only” romp to a more much digestible “Rated M for Mature”! It so intense that our very own Erik asked to dial back the mayhem a wopping 381% or he would notify the police himself! Still interested? Well good because our lawyers say we are only legally allowed to release this type of chaos only ONCE! So close the blinds, take the phone off the hook, and use a VPN to hide your I.P. address because on this week’s episode, we discuss the entrée and have a soft open of the bar…I MEAN DEATH! LOTS OF DEATH!

AI: Episode 8 – Sweetheart of the Song Tra Bong

Let me drop a little piece of information on you; killing a ghost is actually super easy. Where the challenge comes in is convincing management that stealing a bunch of priceless artifacts from an elderly shopkeeper won’t harm public perception of the parent company. That’s the tricky part, and on this week’s episode of Adventurific, the Company is going to do their damnedest to come up with a plan that will not only satisfy HR and Public Relations, but also get them a truck load of awesome weapons and armor! Not only that, but the tale of their misdealing may have traveled up the corporate ladder, which surely won’t lead to any impromptu meetings with the heads of the company! Yes! Those guys! Better put on your best tie and keep your eyes on the middle of the forehead because this week’s episode of Adventurific has some wheeling, some dealing, and some low key stealing!

AI: Episode 7 – Stay out of the Basement!

The Season of Frights might be over, but the ghouls and ghosts are still up for a scare or two on this week’s episode of Adventurific! Join us as the Company learns of a local business that is under the control of a mysterious force that lives in the basement, we put on our meanest faces to deal with the demons in our own cellar, and go toe to toe with something that may be totally not of this dimension! Are we ready to deal with a threat of this extreme paranormal level, or will our inexperience in the field of…succeeding lead to our own deadly demise? You’ll just have to turn out the lights and ignore the noises coming from the beneath the floorboards as we prepare for one last apparitional terror on this week’s episode of Adventurific!

Halloween 2019: Icons and Idiots – Part 1

It’s spoopy szn! With that comes a magical pumpkin of an episode! This time we’re throwing some curve (eye)balls atcha. Beware the DM chair! We’ve got bamboozles and space bots a-aplenty; we’ve got exasperation galore! So put on your bat wings and charge your blasters! It’s HALLOWEEN with Adventurific!

Halloween 2019: Icons and Idiots – Part 2

It’s spoopy szn! With that comes a magical pumpkin of an episode! This time we’re throwing some curve (eye)balls atcha. Beware the DM chair! We’ve got bamboozles and space bots a-aplenty; we’ve got exasperation galore! So put on your bat wings and charge your blasters! It’s HALLOWEEN with Adventurific!

AI: Episode 6 – Oversharing Isn’t a Crime

With every successful business there’s bound to be some up and downs with the initial setup process, but with this particular group of heroes it seems like its nothing but downs! Follow along this week as the Company continues to set up the bar, meets with the 5-0, Skip gets A LITTLE too chatty, and they get an offer that’s way too spooky to refuse! We can promise you that it’s so haunting that it’ll take TWO episodes to uncover its secrets! So, remember to return your cart on time and makes sure you tell the truth because on this week’s Adventurific, WE GOT ONE!

AI: Episode 5 – Do You Have Our Rewards Card?

Once again, Josh has failed to fulfill his contractual duty and provide me with a description. I guess it’s up to me. Uh, join us this week as the Company licks their wounds, talks about their future, and looks for the best deals in town! Will anything be accomplished? Probably not, but join us anyway for this nail biting episode of Adventurific!

AI: Episode 4 – Smokin’ and the Bandits

What happens when Josh takes a last minute trip to NYCC? Nick has to write the description! Join us this week as the Company rolls initiative, an impromptu rave breaks out, and absolutely nothing goes wrong! Will our heroes get what they came for, or will they get what they deserve? Take a seat and get comfortable because this week, Adventurific answers your call in the order it was received!

AI: Episode 3 – Nat Pagle Is My Dad

Ever been at work and you over hear your boss getting chewed out on the phone, and then they proceeds to hoist all that heat on you, so you gotta pick up all the pieces? Great, because on this week’s episode of Adventurific, the newly kitted out Company must brave the wilderness and each other to literally and figuratively put out all the fires upper management is too scared to touch and solve the mystery of the THE FLAMING CART AT THE EDGE OF TOWN, which really isn’t that much of a mystery when you think about it. Follow along as everyone gets to learn more about their fellow employees, try out some of their yet untested skills, and actually do some real critical thinking that actually gets results! So, stay low and go slow because on this episode of Adventurific, the greatest high in the world is the one you get from mysterious strangers in the woods!

AI: Episode 2 – Open For Pimness

When Papa so kindly gives us a shiny gold piece, its best to spend it quickly, because he probably has some dastardly scheme planned that’s going to end up costing us way more! This week, the Company takes to the streets to gear up for the upcoming quests, jobs, and adventures! Tune in to hear a little info gathering with the locals, an embarrassing interaction with a high end weapons shop keep, and some real boss level haggling with a store clerk so weird he makes Erik look sane! Not too sane though, he’s still our Erik. So, get out your rewards card and enter your email to get exclusive offer right on your phone because on this week’s Adventurific, we ain’t paying full price!

AI: Episode 1 – Terms and Conditions

Grab your squid hat and crack open a fresh health potion because Adventurific returns with a fresh coat of paint, some pristine new characters, a baby-faced DM, and an ALL NEW setting as we leave the emptiness of space behind for the vast and fertile landscape of Dungeon & Dragons! Yes, we have returned to the motherland! Tune in this week as our characters do the obligatory “stand up and say something about yourself” routine, we learn how annoying it is to start your own business, and hit the streets to mess with the faceless NPC’s that populate this frozen town, and I know what you are thinking, “Are they already goofing off? Why can’t they take anything seriously?” One, yes and two, we are Adventurific. We cannot. So put on your best tie and remember to fill out all the necessary forms, because this week Adventurific is back and we are totally prepared to ACTUALLY follow the rules this time!

Starfinder: Episode 61 – And Beyond!

Almost two years ago, an unlikely group of assholes came together to find a broken ship and hopefully make a quick buck, but after all the insults, the backstabbing, the petty squabbling, the casual relations, the blood, the guts, the bullets and the corpses, this group of assholes is the only thing left standing between everything and oblivion! Please join us on the Starfinder finale of the Adventurific Radio Hour as the Squad push back one last time with everything they got in attempt to stop the purest incarnation of evil from devouring everything in the galaxy! Their bodies are broken, and their minds are just as fragile, but can they hold themselves together long enough to finally put an end to Red Guy’s terror, or is all life in the universe just as dead as they are? So, strap in one last time and prepare for take-off as we set sail to the action packed finale in Season One of Starfinder; only on Adventurific!

Starfinder: Episode 60 – Dazed and Confused

We are getting so close…our heroes are hurt, their defenses are failing, and the forces of evil don’t seem to be slowing anytime soon, it’s a good thing that the DM can’t roll! Tune into this week’s Adventurific Radio Hour as the biggest battle of our careers rages on, the bodies continue to rain from the sky, Kenntucky attempts to teach Duke more about himself, and as the Dealer struggles to keep warm…maybe we should have thought that one out a little more. Oh well, he was a jerk. Anyway, can the weakening forces of good stop the continuing onslaught of evil or is the end coming sooner than we expected? It’s going to be a mind bending good time either way so dig in, reload your guns, and prepare for death because we are finally at the penultimate episode of the Adventurific Radio Hour!